The Chronicles of Tardville

Fuck it...hop in the bucket and haul ass

2009-07-12T03:25:00.003-05:00

Still alive...graduated college. Still dont have a job thanks to the economy. Lay offs suck. Considering several options. Going back to school. Looking for a job here. Moving to either TN or AL (provided I can find gainful employment in these places). Driving a truck cross country. Who knows cuz I sure the hell dont. Anyway thas bout it...more to follow sooner or later.

Linehand

2009-05-08T00:43:00.002-05:00

Well it is official..I graduated college.Hoorah. I understand now tho why people refer to it as bitter sweet. Glad but also sad to see it go. Most parts I wont miss but some of it I will. I can honestly say we had two of the coolest teachers ever.Not many "real" professors will tolorate the swearing,tobacco useage,Awful conversation,2 hour lunch breaks,extending deadlines over and over and over again and many more things that they did for us this year and for that...Thanks. Doyle and Ronald,You guys are the best. As for the school yes I did graduate minus the pole climbing....somthing about standing on the side of a 50 ft pole with no safty and only a small nylon strap attaching me to this large stick of wood that simply does not fit with me. On a good note tho I passed everything else and got the CDL+endorsments.Go me. Again tho on a dismal note about a month ago the electrical industry hit a hiring freeze so none of us have jobs.That being said ive been thinking hard of going back to school this fall and getting certified in somthing else. I figure what the hell right,Might as well do it while im young,willing to learn and as long as im in school I dont have to worry about paying back the student loans.But who knows..all thats in the future and for now I think im going to try and enjoy my summer..whatever I end up doing. But this was just a short update to let yall know I did finish and thanks for all the encouragement. I guess this time im going to leave yall with some of the best quotes of the year but be forewarned,Some of these are not for the faint of heart and they do include at times massive amounts of swearing so if you get offended easy you might not want to read em.

Top Quotes of the Year

1.Fuck you Ronald-DZ
2.Dude I swear to God we was high as bat pussy-TM
3.That boy couldnt turn a trailer around in hells half acre-DP
4.Back it up till you hear glass rattle then gimmi three feet to make sure you fucked somthing up-RW
5.F and L Method...Fuck it and Leave-NH
6.What in the sam fuck!-NH
7.Looks like a 9 year old nigger did that shit-TM
8.Dude where the fuck is the boo crew going?
9.Sayin is-RW
10.I dont give a frig-RW
11.CHANCE!!!!!!!!
12.Call off the dawgs and piss on the fire-RW
13.Im fucking paintin Doyle...thats why ive been on this goddamn pole for forty fucking minutes..thought Id just climb up here and do some senic paintin-TM
14.Ill be goddamn-NH
15.Nope...No you didnt
16.WHAT THE FUCK!!
17.Dude if I die doing linework im going straight to hell-TM
18.In this type work you dont get hurt..you die
19.Its not if you die its when you die with this shit right here
20.You short legged duck walking bastard.DP
21.Dude I swear it looked like a hachet wound-TM
22.Bust ya ass
23.I gotta shit
24.Lets go ladies!!! We burnin daylight-DP
25.Get your ass in the air and work that fucker hot like you got a pair-DP
26.Thing is son...its hot as 40 hells down there.-SG
27.Well if I woulda known you was gonna do it forty leven times I would have allowed for it
28.When the lights go out..Linemen get it on
29.Linemen do it hot
30.Get your rubbers on and stick it

Linemen Do It Hot

2009-03-01T14:30:00.003-06:00

Still in school. So looking foward to spring break ...2 weeks. Passed the climbing evaluation by the hardest and would have failed if not for a very very nice grade by my instructors. The contract instructors did not approve of my vertical skills. Oh well im a vertical retard. No big deal. Thats why they have bucket trucks. The tests keep getting harder and more frequent but hey thats college right? Getting ready to take the cdl driving test which ought to be just effin great considering the POS truck we have to drive. I have discovered that I worry about myself entirly to much and college is full of reatrds who have no clue that in the real world work dont stop when it rains, when deer season is open, If its great weather to fish, or just because we are whiney little bitches and want to go home. Seriously, welcome to life children. Guess thats about it for now. More to follow....

When the lights go out... Linemen get it on

2009-02-06T23:39:00.002-06:00

Update...still having like 5 tests a day. Making good grades so far. Have cut out 5 times 3 of which resulted in injury. Twice I was over 15 ft in the air. Sucks. Thas it . More to follow

Didnt come to see the show...Came to put it on.

2009-01-25T20:14:00.003-06:00

New stuff...school is going. I passed the cdl permit test which is a requirment to stay in the program. Yay me. We have an avarage of 7 tests a week which is brutal.For those educated folks who understand college jargen...Im taking 22 college credit hours. Pitty for me haha. I will get some pics on here (but not of me falling off the pole).Make sure you read the saying at the bottom. Stop and think about the men who do this next time your power is off in a thunderstorm,ice storm,hurricane or just when you have a regular outage. These men leave their familys at all hours of the day and night and work in every weather hazzard known to man. All the while we take for granted what they do and bitch about them needing to hurry up. So stop and think about them next time you loose the lights. Mabey one day ill be one of them. More to follow....

We the willing
Led by the unknowing
And doing the impossible
For the ungrateful
We have done so much
With so little
For so long
We are now qualified
To do anything
With nothing

LINEMAN
AND PROUD OF IT

New Year

2009-01-13T20:37:00.002-06:00

Well its been a while so i guess i will update you people. Xmas was great and new years was ...well whatever. As far as whats new the weekend after xmas Roadway informed us that as of march 1st we will be let go due to the fact of "company streamlining" so pretty much ima be out of a job after the last weekend in febuary. But on a good note 5 years after i graduated highschool I have decided to go back to college. I have to say its a new experiance for me and I feel so old with all these people who graduated last year. Honestly im in college with people who started kindergarden in 1990. I remeber 1990...rather odd feeling. But as far as school so far im enjoying it. In case your wondering im not in a basics deal. I opted to go for a co op program that the community college offers to train linemen for the power companys.The only problem I can forsee with this choice is the 50-80 foot heights while standing on a 1/4 inch peice of steel held onto my boot by a leather strap and the fact that one mistake and you die. Can i make good career choices or what. Anyway ill update more when i have time. Gotta go study for a test. Yall take care and more to follow....

Christmas...Mississippi style

2008-12-05T21:39:00.002-06:00

Well yall lets try this one on for size.

Twas the night before christmas
And all round the trailer
Not a thing was to be heard
'Cept ole ed drivin that damn hay bailer.

The socks was throwed up
By the rusty stove pipe,
And we left ol santy a plate
Of greens and beef tripe.

Sue Ellen and Bubba had been sent to bed
And they was dreamin bout the new bass boat
Out there in the shed

My ole lady lit a menthol
And started to bitch
You know that kinda shit
That'll give a grown man a twitch.

Then all of a sudden we heerd a big bang
So I grabed my .45
And got ready to kill somthing Goddang.

I busted through the door
In nothing but my shorts
I figured it was a nigger
Or one of their sort.

The moon was out
But fog had set in
So i triped on the lawnmower
And busted my shin.

But now you listen here ...
Yawl wont belive this shit,
There was Santy Clause
Havin a laughin fit.

He stood there a grinin
With that one yellow tooth
Then he said boy did you know
Theres a hole in your roof?

He asked me for rope
Or even some chains
Cause when he landed
He broke one of the reigns.

He had all them whitetails
Standin in line
And I couldnt help but think
They would taste might fine.

They all had names
But hell if I member cause id done got pissed,
On his way in
The sombitch topped out my timber.

Well I cussed him up one side
And then down tha other.
But nothing seemed to faze him
I even called him a mother.

He said now looky here
Im sorry bout those trees
aAnd I do feel bad
Bout that gash in your knee.

But now hang on a second
And ill make it up to you.
He got that bag
And dumped it all out,
Enough toys clothes and junk
To make any brat shout.

I said look ole man
You aint got nothin i need
But then i spied that sack
Of Purina dog feed.

I said well
I rekon i can take that
But we still aint even
You crazy old bat.

He kept on diggin
And come out with some skoal
But not that much ,
Hell it was half a roll.

A six pack got added
And then a nascar cap
But we both knew
#24 wasnt worth crap.

He looked with a twinkle
In both of his eyes
And said what do you need
Or do you want a surprise?

I mulled over this
For a short little spell
Then he laughed and said I got somthing here
You cant even catch on sale.

He grabed that red bag
And started givin it a shake
Then out fell a new motor
With a Holly intake!

I said now we bout right
But one more thing,
How come you stoped here
Or is this a dream?

But he didnt answer
Instead he just smiled
Jumped in the sleigh
And cracked that whip like wild.

Then all them deers
Lit out of that gate
Reminded me of Richard Petty
Comin through turn 8.

I took all my stuff
And threw it in the door
Then stood there and watched
Till i couldnt see him no more.

Now I do want to thank you
For readin this yarn
I tried mixin classics
With a little trailer trash charm.
But please dont forget
The true christmas meaning this year
And yall have a safe and happy new year.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-01T22:59:00.002-06:00

Wow two in as many days. I seriously dont have a social life. But somthing has been bugging me and I wanna get it out. Why if any of you can tell me do people try to be somthing they are not? One thing I hate is fake people(on a side note for those of you who truly know me you also know that I dislike almost everybody) but i really can not stand fake people. I mean do they think by lying about what or who they are that I think more of them? Just to make an example ...seminary students now a days have an air about them that I havent seen with (for lack of a better way of saying it) folks who do have somthing to brag about. Big deal you have a degree in pastorial ministry. Nobody gives a shit. You are still in a lowly paid profession that comes with a boatload of stress and no job secuirty what so ever. Yet they still love to wear the three peice suits and have the black berry on the belt becuase they are sombody. Well whooptifuckingdo.I could choose to go on about the whole pastors being arrogant asses deal but that is for another blog entirly. But back to what im getting at.. Why try to be somthing your not? Some of the most down to earth folk I have run across and had conversations with are convicted murders. I learned a lot in the time I spent as a corrections officer and if you want to see some one not trying to put on a front talk a walk in a felony pod with 10 or 15 people on murder,rape or kidnapping charges. They have nothing to prove. They also have nothing to lose but that to is a whole different story that I will have to cover at a later time. But anyway this still aint out like I had it in my mind but I cant think of how else to put it.More comin sooner or later...And I still need that beer.

2008-11-30T21:57:00.002-06:00

So ive been sitting here staring at a blank screen now for about 15 minutes trying to figure out what I want to write. I dont really have anything. And this is weird because I have always loved to talk. Dont get to do it that much anymore tho for the fact that all my frineds are now married and have children so conversations with them seem to have shifted from normal things to problems with the daycare service or child disipline or and this is my favorite " I swear to God if my ole lady dont quit bitchin ima divorce her ass". To which I always have the responce of "I told you it was a fuck up to get married". See my deal with it is all my biddues seem to have settled and got married because it was the next step your supposed to do in life. You know graduate ,get a job, get married, have kids, grow old and then death. On a side note most of the ones I know reversed the order between marriage and kids which could play a part in the reason they got married. Im 23 and I have no desire to have kids or get married of course I can truly say that even if I did have that dredful wish there is not much of a selection here. They either already have kids and expect you to walk right on in to a ready made family or else they have been married and divorced and are so bitter that it would make a green persimmon seem sweet. So honestly why not enjoy life. I am certian of very little but of the few things I do know I can tell you this. I have no clue what I want to be when I grow up. I am freakishly scared of commitment. And I will not start a family until I am sure that I can provide for them and have a place for them to live and a very comfortable means of support. But yet again I have run out of things to say so ill sign off. And if any of you out there can obilge...I need a cold beer. More to follow

Update

2008-11-26T16:32:00.002-06:00

I rekon I need to update this thing more often. Nothing new around here tho. Thanksgiving is tommorow which means us casuals get to work. Im bout pissed with East Mississippi CC. They keep dickin around with my enrollment stuff and im fast running out of time to get enrolled. Thas pretty much it. I would like to say that I despise cold weather with a passion just in case anybody was wondering.OK this is ending now because im out of random things to say. Peace

Four Walls of Raiford

2008-11-18T22:48:00.002-06:00

Well them four walls of Raiford, closing in on me
Doin three to five hard labor, for armed robbery
I had two years behind, but I could not wait the time
Everytime I thought about it, well I died some more inside

And I had stripes on my back, memories that hurt
For the only time I seen sunshine is when I hit the dirt
Diggin ditches for the chain gang, sleepin in the cold
Oh Lord please forgive me for I could not wait no more

And I comin home to see you Jesus
Well it feels so close this time
Please take mercy on this soldier
From the Florida-Georgia line

When they find me they must kill me
Oh Jesus save my soul
I cant go back down to Raiford
I cant take that anymore

Well these last few years behind me
Oh lord, have been so sad
I fought proudly for my country when the times were bad
Now they say Im guilty, when they find me I must die

Only me and Jesus know that I never stole a dime
Well when vietnam was over there was no work here for me
I had a pretty wife awaitin and two kids I had to feed
Well Im one of Americas heroes and when they shoot me down
Wont you fly old glory proudly, put my medals in the ground

And I comin home to see you Jesus
Well it feels so close this time
Please take mercy on this soldier
From the Florida-Georgia line

When they find me they must kill me
Oh Jesus save my soul
I cant go back down to Raiford
I cant take that anymore

Speaking my mind

2008-11-10T21:38:00.002-06:00

First and foremost I want the people who read this to understand that I am not going after one single person. This is addressed to everyone who chooses to read anything I write on here which includes a LOT of people from my Myspace account and my Facebook account. Sadly tho,they choose not to comment out right on here and rather wish to send me messages or emails stating what they think. I guess they don't want everyone seeing what they write or some other unknown reason but enough of that as I am rambling. Now getting to the point, Over the past year I have been in several heated debates if you will over myself and my relationship with the Lord. While this blog is in a way about that particular thing in a way it also is not about that and I would like to go ahead and say what I have said to all the others on the matter. It is MY relationship not yours so mind your own business. What seems to spark most of these comments emails and messages sent my way about my relationship with God is my choice of using words that are at times hateful, hurtful, and very vulgar. Yes I do know it is a sin and I do know it does not reflect on me well as a person but I will stand before God one day and answer for it . Therefore it is my concern and I do thank you folks for caring enough to worry about it but again it is between me and the Lord. Now that being said I'm about to vent a little bit and Ive got a feeling its not going to make me any new friends and it might cost me a few of the ones I have but I'm willing to take that chance. Since you folks worry so much about me and my relationship and love to point out that my foul language is not Godly and he is not pleased by it I feel it is my duty to point out some things that you folks do that are also not pleasing to Him. For starters as we have already covered crass wording is one of them but lets look at what crass wording covers. Yes cursing is on the list but so are things that are mean spirited or hateful. Now i know none of you good christian people do anything of the sort. Why you didn't even lose your temper this morning when you were running late for work and three different people cut you off on the freeway. I know you did what God would do and said a prayer for every one of those folks. I also want to point out that what we watch can be considered a sin. Now granted all you Christians can prolly skip this part and turn on TBN because as good saints that's all you watch(unless the Rev. Graham has a special on prime time or Bill Gather is having yet another homecoming show) but this one goes to all the folks who like to watch the dirty shows. You know things like Greys Anatomy or CSI and don't forget Dancing with the Stars. But wait what about the sit coms like 2 and half men or the office? Are these shows not sexually charged in one way or another or they have questionable situations in them. That's a sin folks. As Christians we shouldn't be watching that trash. I'm not even going to touch on the soaps as that is a whole book in it self. Well now your still reading and I'm glad but you say well I don't have road rage I'm always kind in my speech and i don't watch that much TV. Do you listen to the radio at all ? The mainstream music these days is full of garbage. Language,sexual material,and violence. Some of it is almost like watching tv with your eyes shut.But I know all the good Christians out there only listen to the holy stations. Well what about everyday things like eating. Did you know that your body is a temple? It is the Temple of the Holy Spirit. Would you throw garbage in your local church? No you wouldn't but lets take a look at what you throw in your personal temple. Have you ever eaten fast food? Or how about something fried. Sweets? Caffeinated drinks ,tea or coffee? All these things are harmful to your body. Its like putting trash in your body. Do you exercise regularly. If you don't that's not good for your body so therefor we conclude its not good for the temple. But wait while we are on your body ...do you drink alcohol? Or what about tobacco usage. That drink or smoke can be deadly. Guess what....Do you give up yet? Its a sin to not take care of your body. Oh but Ive got more...How many of you out there like to shop for days or work the long hours to make that paycheck look better. Did you know that a non christian can look at that from the outside and say you worship those things. Its strange the way folks can shape something to fit the argument for the side they are on. And now the kicker. This one is going to cost me some friends. This is the south and we love our college football ,Oh yes we do. And we take pride in our teams and a friendly banter back and forth with other fans for different teams. But some of the folks out there go a little far don't you think? Emotions get the best of you but its only a game right. So we threatened to kill the other team. We only meant as far as the game was concerned. Or did we. I mean we would never take a game so serious that we actually get so emotional about it that we cry or pout when our team loses. We don't take it so far as to name our children after the coach or that star running back or quarterback. And we sure don't gloat when we do win. We shake hands with the other team and their fans and tell them they played a great game.Or do we. Wait....lets stop and look at it for a second....did we really ...no we couldn't have. Could we? Is a game or a certain team that important to me? Could non Christians really look at how I acted at that game and question my morals or character? Could they say that football is my god? Surely not. Now like I said i know I lost some friends on that but if your are still reading I'm glad because I want you to hear this and know it comes from my heart. I do thank you all for caring enough to be concerned for me. But as I said before that is between me and the Lord. Not you me and the Lord. Be concerned for yourself. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone". You keep that in mind and examine your own life before you start judging mine. More to follow..........

2008-11-04T22:51:00.002-06:00

WE ARE SO FUCKED...Hide the Bibles go stock up on ammo and get ready for a shit storm. All self respecting persons should no longer wish to be considered americans as that is now a communist nation. I am a God fearing southerner. Would post more but have to work tommorow. Millions in this country are about to start sending me the bills for crack,whores,malt liquor,cadillacs,rims and fried chicken.....Such a sad sad day....More to follow (untill my freedom of speech is removed by the antichrist)

2008-11-02T21:56:00.002-06:00

Since bordom has consumed most of my life I thought I would tell you folks a little about my job.

At left we see the company logos for Roadway and Yellow. The two merged in '05 I belive to form what is now known as YRC Worldwide. According to what I have been told the company went straight to hell shortly after this union.I work for the Roadway part of the company here in Tardville also known as 457.Teamster Local 891.This picture was taken at the Sparks NV terminal. Notice the well constructed warehouse and smooth paved parking lot. Alas this is not the case at 457.
Here is a more accurate picture to describe the conditions at the 457 minus the water frontage. Replace the water with pot hole riddled pavement and make sure to invision at least 3 dump truck loads of trash thrown everywhere. Welcome to Roadway.
At the 457 I work on the dock as what the company likes to refer to as a "Professional Freight Handler". The more appropriate term for this would be dockhand. Not to belittle anyone who does this work but a retarded monkey on crack could do this job. Dont get me wrong I love it but lets not blow our own horns here and make it more complex than it should be. At right you will notice the saftey sign. We have these all over the dock here.
As we see the signs dont seem to help much. While this paticular image was not taken at 457 similar things can,will ,and have happened. We make OSHA proud.

As the supervisors like to preach constantly..."Pack it high Pack it tight". I was unable to get any pictures of the daily grind to show yall but it would make everyone proud. High and tight is the way to go and we do whatever it takes to make sure this happens. Break it, beat it, push it, tear it, force it and as one veteran of 19 years told me one day "Go get me the duct tape and a crow bar...Goddamnit we will make it fit".So as you can see we truly do care about our customers and we take pride in making sure we do the job right. Roadway. Your Way. More to follow...........

First Things First

2008-11-02T01:53:00.002-05:00

Ok so im new to this whole thing and i doubt if anybody will read very much of it. This is just a glimpse into my life and the random and somtimes not so random things that happen. Some of it you may find funny and some of it you may not agree with, But its me and if you dont like it I really dont give a shit. I did enable the adult content warning because i do tend to get graphic with the wording at times. If it offends you then allow me to politly invite you to FUCK OFF. See what I mean...just cant be helped somtimes. Anyways I guess thats about it for now so check back....more to follow. Oh yes on a side note I would like to thank H.G. for the title of this blog. Always original haha.